Migration: ‘I just wanted a better life for her’, says father of child killed during crossing

Standing on the beach, Ahmed Alhashimi screams at the waves that come and go, beating his chest, giving in to the pain, anger and guilt that won’t go away.

The previous week, in the early hours of the morning, on that same stretch of French coast south of Calais, the 41-year-old man was squeezed inside an inflatable boat screaming for help. He begged people to make room for him to bend down and rescue his 7-year-old daughter Sara, who was being crushed in the suffocating darkness.

“I just wanted that man to move so I could get my baby,” explains Ahmed.

He refers to a young Sudanese man who was part of a larger group who boarded at the last minute, when the boat was already far from shore. The man ignored him, and then threatened him, he says.

“It was like death itself. We saw people die. I saw how those men behaved. They didn’t care who they stepped on, whether it was a child or someone’s head, young or old. People started suffocating,” says Ahmed with resentment.

Although Ahmed is Iraqi, his daughter did not even know the country. She was born in Belgium and spent most of her short life in Sweden.

In total, five people died in the same incident.

I was on the beach at the time with a BBC crew and saw the chaos as the smugglers, escorting their passengers up the beach towards a small boat, used fireworks and wielded sticks to fend off a group of French police who tried, unsuccessfully, , preventing the group from boarding.

As the boat headed out to sea, we heard someone shouting on board. But in the darkness of the morning it was impossible to know what was happening.

At dawn, the police were already leaving the coast along with an alleged drug trafficker and some of the migrants who were unable to board.

Ahmed later confirmed that he was the man we heard screaming for help, desperately pleading with those around him to save Sara’s life.

Ahmed’s wife, Nour AlSaeed, and his two other children, Rahaf, 13, and Hussam, 8, were also trapped among the people but managed to breathe.

“I’m a construction worker. I’m strong. But even I couldn’t get my leg out, stuck in the crowd. No wonder my daughter couldn’t either. She was under our feet,” says Ahmed.

This was the family’s fourth attempt to cross from France to the UK since arriving in the region two months ago.

Police stopped them twice on the beach as they tried to keep up with the rest of the migrants running toward a smuggler’s boat.

Ahmed says that this time the traffickers — who charged US$1,600 (about R$9,000) per adult and half that amount for each child — had promised that only 40 people would board their boat, but another group of migrants appeared on the beach and insisted on boarding.

Sara was calm at first. She was holding her father’s hand as they walked out of Wimereux train station the previous afternoon. During the night, they hid in some dunes north of the city.

Just before 6 am, the group had already inflated the boat. The traffickers ordered the migrants to take the boat to the beach and run it towards the sea before the police intercepted them.

Ahmed says that suddenly a police tear gas canister exploded near them and Sara started screaming.

Once they boarded, Ahmed held Sara on his shoulders for about a minute, but then placed her on the floor to help his other daughter, Rahaf, board.

That’s when he lost sight of Sara.

Only later, when French rescue teams intercepted them at sea and disembarked some of the more than 100 people crammed into the boat, did Ahmed finally manage to reach his daughter’s body.

“I saw her head in the corner of the boat. It was all blue. She was already dead when we took her out. She wasn’t breathing”, he explains, between sobs.

Now French authorities are looking after the family as they wait to bury Sara’s body.

Ahmed says he is aware of the strong criticism he has received on social media from people who accuse him of putting his family at unnecessary risks. He appears to be torn between accepting and rejecting these accusations.

“I will never forgive myself. But the sea was the only option I had. Everything that happened was against my will. I was left with no options. People blame me and say, ‘How did you put your daughters at risk?’ But I’ve been in Europe for 14 years and I’ve been rejected,” says Ahmed, detailing years of failed attempts to secure EU residency after fleeing Iraq after claiming to have received threats from militia groups.

Belgium apparently denied asylum on the grounds that Basra, its hometown in Iraq, was classified as a safe zone.

He says his children have spent the last seven years with a relative in Sweden, but was recently informed that they would be deported, along with him, to Iraq.

“If I knew there was a 1% chance of staying with children in Belgium, France, Sweden or Finland, I would stay there. The only thing I want for my children is for them to go to school. I don’t want any kind of welfare. My wife and I can work. I just wanted to protect them, their childhood and their dignity,” he continues.

“If people were in my shoes, what would they do? Those who (criticize me) didn’t suffer what I suffered. This was my last option,” he says, appealing to the British government for solidarity and support.

Eva Jonsson, Sara’s teacher in Uddevalla, Sweden, describes the girl as “kind and good” in a video message sent to the BBC.

“She had a lot of friends at school. They played together all the time… In February, we found out that they were going to deport her and that it would be quick. They told us two days in advance,” he explains.

Upon learning of his death, the class gathered in a circle and observed a minute of silence.

“It is very regrettable that this happens to such a nice family. I have already taught (other) children from this family and I was very surprised by the deportation”, says the teacher.

“We still have Sara’s photo in the classroom and we will keep it here for as long as the children want.”