Say ‘no’ more, be willing to communicate: the 5 rules for happiness at work created by a cognitive scientist | Future of work

In January 2018, a class broke the participation record at the three-hundred-year-old Yale University, one of the most prestigious and expensive in the United States. The interest began even before the teacher, cognitive scientist Laurie Santos, entered the classroom for the course she called “Psychology and a good life”. In three days, simply 1,200 undergraduate students, almost 1/4 of the university’s total that year, had enrolled in the class, taught to this day.

The repercussion allowed Laurie to create an online version, with more than 4 million students around the world, and gave rise to the weekly podcast “The Happiness Lab”, which has already released more than 170 episodes. All of this for a reason that seems trivial, but that affects many more people than you might think: people have difficulty feeling happy.

— I created the course when I noticed the mental problems of young people. A survey showed that, among university students, more than 40% talked about depression, more than 60% about anxiety, and one in ten said they had considered committing suicide — he said Laurie, in a talk at South by Southwest (SXSW), the world’s main innovation festival, held in Austin, Texas. — And this problem is not just for youth. Issues such as the pandemic, climate change and advances in technology have increased anxiety and burnout in the workplace. The year 2024 has become a mess for many people.

As with her course at Yale 6 years ago, Laurie’s presence at SXSW also drew a small crowd to see her presentation, this time aimed at adults and titled “Five Ways to Improve Well-Being in the Workplace: Emerging Trends of the Science of Happiness”. One of the points she defends is that ensuring a worker’s happiness means improving a company’s results.

The researcher showed the results of a 2023 study by the American employment agency Indeed carried out in partnership with scientists from the University of Oxford, which traced the direct relationship between happiness and profit.

“The companies with the happiest employees are the ones that are making the most money,” Laurie said.

And how can we better establish this relationship? Below is a summary of Laurie’s five suggestions for the difficult path of finding happiness at work.

Don’t run away from frustrations

Laurie says it’s a mistake to try to ignore frustrations that can arise at work. In general, we believe that negative feelings hinder our performance and, therefore, we suppress them. But, for her, it’s the opposite: our performance worsens when we don’t face the problem. She compares the sensation to a car’s warning system. If we don’t pay attention to the lights that come on on the dashboard, we could run out of gas or the engine could stop.

— Imagine, for example, a situation in which you receive a frustrating email with unpleasant news — says Laurie. — Instead of avoiding the issue, the first step is to identify and name what you are feeling, and then understand why this news affects you so deeply.

Kill your time hunger

In your work routine, the feeling of not having enough time to complete tasks is similar to the feeling of an empty stomach. This is what is called “time hunger”: the idea that there is never enough space in the agenda to hold meetings, prepare reports, answer emails and still have a personal life.

As time is a resource that is both valuable and limited, Laurie suggests rethinking what productivity is. She cites American researcher Cal Newport and his concept of “pseudo-productivity”. This is when we think that the frenzy of always being busy at the office is confused with results.

— People think they are productive when they are doing anything, no matter what it is. The employee enters a meeting just to think he is being useful. But these tasks do not always contribute to the business objective — says Laurie.

To combat time hunger, the researcher believes that we should say “no” more to others and to ourselves, developing the ability to discern between what is truly important and what can be left aside.

Have self-compassion and embrace yourself

A common mistake in the workplace, according to Laurie, is putting pressure on ourselves to do more all the time. The researcher, however, believes that a better form of motivation in the office is through self-compassion and not pressure.

She states that we need to understand that failures and difficulties are perfectly normal and should not generate frustration. In situations like this, Laurie adds that we should talk to ourselves, the same way we do with friends: with kindness, concern and curiosity.

She also believes that everyone should develop the “self-hug”: a gesture of showing self-affection, which would help face routine challenges.

Understand your vocation

There are several particularities in a job that can match our skills. Laurie advises us to find this intersection between obligation and what makes us proud of ourselves: it could be, among other characteristics, the spirit of leadership, good humor, integrity of character, modesty or perseverance.

She says that, by identifying our vocation within that work, we can avoid feelings such as burnout. For her, facing burnout requires more than simply changing jobs or reducing the workload. A transformation is needed in the way we perceive and perform our roles. By focusing on our strengths and consciously applying them in the workplace, we can create a richer, more satisfying work experience.

make friends

Because we spend so much time at work, Laurie explains that we feel the need to belong. It’s the feeling that you matter to that place and that others care about you.

— Some say that the office is just a place to work and go away. But connections with other people make work more enjoyable. It’s important when we know we have a best friend at work — says the researcher.

Laurie then defends a rule for anyone who wants to make friends, regardless of location:

— Be positive and willing to communicate. It’s not supposed to be nice all the time, but we’re not an artificial intelligence robot that just does its tasks and switches off — says Laurie Santos.