Nick Cave reveals he feels guilty about his children’s deaths: ‘Extremely difficult’

In an interview, musician Nick Cave recalled one of the most difficult moments of his life: death of two of his children.

During a conversation with The Guardian, Cave admitted that he still blames himself for what happened to Arthur and Jethro.

“I think it’s something that people who lose children feel [culpa], regardless of the situation, simply because one of the only things you’re supposed to do is not let your children die,” he told The Guardian. “Forget it. The only thing you must do is protect your children.”

Arthur, the result of his marriage to Susie Cave, died in 2015. He was 15 years old when he fell off a cliff while high on LSD. Jethro, from his marriage to Beau Lazenby, died in 2022, when he was 31 years old.

“Look, it’s extremely difficult to talk about this, but one of the things that I used to worry a lot about is that Arthur, wherever he is, if he’s anywhere, somehow understands what his parents are going through because of something that he did, and that his culpability is not much different than mine. And I think that’s the reason behind a lot of the things I do. It’s to say that it’s okay. I mean, it’s not okay, but we’re We’re fine. I think Susie feels that way too,” he explained in the interview.

Grief

The artist also explains that the public exposure of his life made the grieving process difficult.

“It stopped me from completely closing the windows, locking the doors and just living in this dark world.” He also explained that having lost Arthur years earlier meant he “knew I could get through this”.

Fortunately, Cave found comfort in Red Hand Files, a website where he communicates with fans. There, found support from admirers.

“It was something really extraordinary. And that attention, and sense of community, was extremely helpful to me. I think people are often alone with this kind of thing. Susie had met someone whose son had passed away seven years earlier and she hadn’t yet talked with her husband about it. These people are completely alone and perhaps filled with anger. So I can’t emphasize enough that I’ve been in an extraordinarily privileged position in that sense,” he said.

Today, Nick says he is simple about life. He is also the father of Earl and Luke. The last one is the son of Brazilian Viviane Carneiro.

“I’m quite simple about things. It says something to my children who died, that I can enjoy my life now. That’s what they would have wanted. I think we have a smoother relationship with the world now,” he highlighted.