Frederica Lima highlighted, this Thursday, on social media, Freedom, on the occasion of the 25th of April.
“Freedom of being able to wake up early in the morning without screaming or the obligation to stay in bed waiting for permission to get up. Having to remain still so as not to disturb them. Freedom to be able to listen to music when I want, how I want, the music I want, that I like, to sing, to dance, whether at home, in the car or with headphones anywhere”he started by writing on Instagram.
“Freedom to have your house tidy, organized, clean and smelling good. Freedom to be with my friends, to leave the house or welcome them into my home without having to ask for permission, without shouting, without mistreatment, without unfounded accusations and without violence.”continued Frederica Lima.
“Freedom to be able to use my cell phone/computer without being questioned, without violence and without constant humiliation. Without having someone constantly control what I do, who I talk to, without judgment and without taking the phone out of my hands.”added Frederica Lima.
“Freedom to be who I am, as I am, with my qualities and my defects. Freedom to greet whoever I want, to work where I want, to eat what I want, to go where I want, to say what’s in my soul.”said Frederica Lima.
Frederica Lima further noted: “Freedom to finally be away from the toxicity of those who neither live nor let live. From those who cannot tolerate the happiness and independence of a simple woman who all she wants is to be happy, to live with joy, with music, to smile and make people smile, to learn a little more every day, to get to know the world, to build a future, to create a family and to make your dreams come true.”.
“It took a toll. It was necessary to be a prisoner to be able to appreciate all the little things that make us unique, free and happy. Every day there is a tear for the pain of what happened, and a smile for finally having it over.”reported Frederica Lima.
“To all Women, never allow an individual, whether through violence, blackmail, humiliation or constant victimization, to control and imprison you. Let nothing and no one stop you from being happy as you deserve. A big kiss to everyone, to Women in particular, as there is still a lot to be done until we can have Justice, equality and the respect we deserve in a world full of spoiled children and cowards who think that Women are mere objects”concluded Frederica Lima.
In the comments of the publication, you can read: “It’s a shame to let all this happen”. “If I saw it from the outside, I would probably say the same thing and not be able to understand it. I really think that only those who go through this know why they went through it. Because he loved, because he believed in all the lies, he believed in a change in behavior that never came.”replied Frederica Lima.
“All aggression always had an excuse and the blame always fell on me, whatever it was, and I admit that the brainwashing was so well done that my self-esteem was reduced to dust. It’s a ‘waking up’ that takes time. But after waking up, you never sleep the same way again, much less in the same bed. Never”added Frederica Lima.
“The greatest blindness is that of those who don’t want to see… and, in addition to being in love, I was blind and remained blind for a long time, unfortunately”he considered.
In the comments, Nádia Lopes, Nuno Homem de Sá’s ex-girlfriend, also wrote: “What’s more unfortunate is that I realized that I spent little time compared to everyone else and had so much opportunity… and I did nothing… Oh, time goes backwards”. “I know that all of that is traumatic and you will be recovering, I hope. Look on the bright side, at least you only lost three months of your life. And a few more recovering from that traumatic experience.”commented Frederica Lima.
Still in the comments, Nádia Lopes also said: “I love you, my warrior”. “You were more of a warrior who put the brakes on ‘in time’”said Frederica Lima.
“Control always comes from people who are insecure, unresolved and cannot be trusted… always”commented a follower.
“And truth. The problem is when you love someone and you want to see them happy… and they tell you that ‘this hurts me’ and you stop doing it to avoid hurting them… ‘this makes me feel abandoned’ and you stop doing it because you love the person and what you want most is to be at peace with him… and this vicious cycle leads you to stop doing things every day, because, at the slightest contradiction, he explodes with anger and blows up everything around him, including you”said Frederica Lima.
“It’s only when you get out of prison that you realize you didn’t do anything wrong. There is no harm in talking or being with friends. There’s no harm in going to work. Leaving the gate to take the trash to the container is okay. And he didn’t even let me do that. Because he said that I was traumatizing him and that he had been abandoned by his mother and I was doing the same to him (and the container was just a few meters from the gate)… It’s a lot of manipulation and unhealthy control from someone who has several problems and needs to be accompanied”said Frederica Lima.
“I usually say that those who need psychotherapy lead others to believe that they are the ones who need it!!! Basically, those who just want to help get sick to the point of thinking they need psychotherapy!! I have also passed through the hands of narcissists and people who should be in treatment, at the very least.”indicated another follower.
“He needs therapy, but I don’t just blame him, I blame all those who allowed him to be like this and who supported him to switch from one to another, to mistreat us without ever being held accountable. Whoever closed their eyes knowing what was happening is also to blame and is responsible.”defended Frederica Lima.
“If they had set limits and held him responsible for the violence he commits from an early age, perhaps he could have had a different life in which he didn’t blow up most of the Women who tried to make him a Man and who believed in a ‘love’ that never existed . It’s all bad, it’s all a big lie and a camouflage of a rotten structure that will continue to focus more on the ‘good name’ than on solving the problem.”concluded Frederica Lima.
Another internet user also wrote: “I’m so sorry… I thought you were so complicit. Frederica always defended him in everything! I sometimes thought that we (those watching from the outside) were wrong.”.
“But I loved him very much, I will never deny it. I really thought he was everything he said he was and I believed that we were, in fact, ‘soulmates’, regardless of the age difference. I fell in love and blindly trusted a character who appeared, at first, polite, respectful, with life goals and a vision of life that was said to be identical to mine and, when she took me for granted, the mask began to fall and what what was behind her was something that not even in my worst nightmares could I have imagined.”confessed Frederica Lima.
“I was educated and grew up in a stable, healthy and happy environment, I was lucky and I am very grateful for that. But in my education and experience I had never experienced violence, much less with that brutality, which became daily as well as constant insults, humiliation and all aggressiveness in actions and words. It was and still is a shock.”highlighted Frederica Lima.
“But a bigger shock than all that violence is wanting to learn and understand so that you never again, with anyone else, fall into a relationship as toxic as this one was, not even in the idle talk of those who use women for status, to not be alone, for sex, for a punching bag and for him to vent his frustrations, to be talked to, to inflame his ego and to be supported. It was all very bad”maintained Frederica Lima.
